Have you ever noticed an individual who was self confident, not necessarily to the point of arrogance, but just that it came naturally for them? Some people don’t seem to have issues with self-confidence. Have you ever wondered why that is? How is it that some people just walk through life without ever doubting themselves or their intuition while others struggle with these issues?
Well, I’m here to tell you that those people are rare. Often, those you think are confident and have never faced a day of self-doubt, actually have battled the self-doubt monster.
So, you’ll be happy to know, self-confidence is a learnable skill. Yes, some people will find it easier to develop self-confidence than others. Perhaps they are more resilient. Perhaps they had a more supportive environment growing up. In the end though, all that doesn’t really matter. What matters is that if you want to be self-confident, you can choose to take actions that will get you there.
Put it in Writing
Action #1: Write it down. We all have our strengths, but sometimes we focus on our weaknesses. If this is you, then perhaps it is time to put pen to paper. Making a list of your good qualities, your strengths, and your achievements.
Be very specific, own your uniqueness. For example, don’t just write that you are organized. Be specific and write down that you have wonderful time management skills therefore allowing you to be organized. For example, I might write that I’m a spread sheet queen — I use spreadsheets to organize everything. I have lists of every book I own, including when I got it and how I got it. I have several spreadsheets helping me organize all the things that go into planning my upcoming wedding. I even have a spreadsheet that organizes my budget! You see, these are specific and, to some degree, unique to me. Write this kind of stuff down.
Work on that list until you have at least 100 things jotted down — and believe me you can find them. Now, each time you feel discouraged, take a look at your list. It is so easy to beat yourself up, but when we see your awesomeness in writing it makes it easier to remember that you have already accomplished so much.
Practicing Self-Confidence Makes Perfect
Action #2: Practice being self-confident. Imagine what being self-confident feels like. Heck, fake it! It’s like that song from “The King and I”: “Whenever I feel afraid, I hold my head erect and whistle a happy tune, so no one will suspect I’m afraid.”
Be an actor on the stage of your life, acting as the character you wish to be. Basically … act as if you are self-confident, and soon you will be. The more you do this, the easier it will get to take on self confidence and to have it become natural.
The Art of Looking Good
Action #3: Make yourself look good. When you look good, you feel good. Part of the reason I’m shooting this video today is because I just finished a hair and makeup trial for my wedding. I’m looking good and didn’t want it to go to waste!
Take time to groom yourself! Put on clothes that make you feel good and presentable. Brush your teeth. Get a new haircut. Eat more healthfully. All these little actions will support your new self-confident self.
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